2007-08-14 - 10:18 p.m.

Lazarus returns.

Again here in the desert, around 95 even at 1018 PM. I have delved into afflictions in their purest essence: pure, introspective anxiety, pure lonliness, pure frustration, pure sorrow. While fasting for 6 days. And without projecting these afflictions externally (i.e. THIS/HE/SHE made me feel this way!!), one can see the thoughtforms in their rawest form, until they begin to consume themselves. Only by drinking the supreme poison of every thought-affliction does healing and transcendence begin.

And yes, it was catalyzed by someone: by ... I didn't know I could unravel so profoundly from this. Somehow you ended up wrapped around my very soul, and it was utmost shards when you vanished. This has been an astounding catalyst to further my spiritual training, to purify my connection to Vastness. In the ache and anger, I turned towards it source: . In my lonliness, I understand. This is exactly the danging over thousandfoot cliffs that every warrior needs.